[LOVE FOR TECHNOLOGIES OF LOATHING]
In 2017, amidst what felt like a never-ending avalanche of personal battles, I made the images for THE ULTIMATE. Alone, unclothed, I produced a series of performative scanographs in of my old flatbed scanner. I put it up vertically on my desk, and wrote a script on my computer to automate the scanning and saving process, allowing me to stay immersed in my poses. Each image, a product of up to 30 minutes of still performance, captured not just a pose but the transformation of the pornographic gesture towards a place more authentic, between sweaty skin and muscle fatigue. The work remained dormant, only to resurface in an exhibition at Helmaus Zürich as their first physical manifestation in early 2024. I transferred the digital scans onto color negative film to print them in the darkroom.
Throughout the curation process before the show, I found myself referring to these images as die Frau/diese Frau (this woman) instead of myself. It's as if I was observing a separate entity, detached.
These works are peripheral in some way. They embody my concerns with iteration and reappropriation in the photographic.